Cherished Family Memories: Sunday Dinner Reflections

Picture this…..

It’s a balmy spring afternoon, the sun is out, the piano is playing in the background, there’s conversation all around, kids are playing outside in the backyard, maybe collecting apples from the tree, playing tag or maybe even downstairs sliding back and forth on the rec room floor, adult siblings joking around fighting over their favourite cookie that their mother made and a beautiful lady sitting, listening, looking around at all her family gathered in her home for Sunday dinner.

That’s what it was like when we visited my grandma (Irene Stella Hartford Matthew) in her house in Delta on any given Sunday. My grandpa (Stanley Leonard Briggs) passed away at the age of 53 when I was young (6 years old) and I don’t really remember much about him. I don’t really remember having these dinners until I was a bit older.

My family (my dad, mom, brother and I) were living in New Westminster when Grandpa passed away in 1969, not long before my youngest brother was born. It was unexpected after having heart surgery, which was supposed to fix the problem he had, but had a heart attack about four days after the surgery and didn’t make it. Grandpa passed away 56 years ago today.

Grandma came from a large family where she was the youngest of nine while Grandpa was an only child. Grandpa did most of the household finances, shopping, cooking and other household chores as she was not raised to do those kinds of things. Grandma didn’t go to school as she had an illness when she was quite young, and her parents decided she would stay home and be schooled by her father who was a teacher. Her mother passed away when Grandma was only 14 years old, and three of her sisters ended up taking care of her. She married when she was 22 only to be divorced a short five years later. She married my grandfather a couple of years later.

They had three children – Grant Irving (1940), Irene ‘Evelyn’ (1943) and Stanley ‘Richard’ (1944). All three married and curiously enough, each had three children, just like their parents.

After Grandpa passed, my dad moved our family to his parent’s home. My parents took it upon themselves to show Grandma how to take care of her household which included finances, cooking and outside chores. We lived there only a year, but it is something that I remember quite vividly.

Going back to the ‘picture’ above I asked you to try and see, you can imagine the family gatherings at the house with my dad and his brother and sister, fighting over the cookies (my grandma’s famous heavy cakes), their spouses thinking their crazy, and all nine grandkids playing in different areas of the house and outside.

Grandma always made dinner and if it was someone’s birthday, there was always a homemade angel food cake with that person’s favourite icing and goodies in the middle (mine was Smarties!).

The reason I wanted to do a post like this was to ensure those memories remain for me. I know for my siblings and cousins, the Sunday dinners may have some different memories, but I hope this will help to bring some of the wonderful memories back.

Happy memories! Oh, and Happy 65th Birthday to my beautiful cousin, Sandy!

How Family History Shapes Our Lives

When thinking of an historic event, you may think of the Great Depression, World Wars, Pearl Harbor, Fall of the Berlin Wall or a more recent event, Covid-19.

When I think of historic events, I lean more towards major events in people’s lives. Although the historic events mentioned above can impact many lives, events, either minor or major, can influence someone’s path in life.

So, as you can imagine, there can be many such events in everyone’s life, meaning it would make it difficult to narrow it down to just one.

I’m not going to delve through all my ancestors to try and come up with something but take an easier path and go with an event in my own life. See there, I just altered my path!

There have been many events that have taken place and adjusted my path, impacting not only my life but also those of my own family. There are two major events that have happened in my life that have led me down the path to genealogy.

The first is my cousin Donna’s passing in October 2018, and the second is my dad’s open-heart surgery in November 2019. I won’t go into the specifics of these two occasions; needless to say, they both spoke to me in different ways but in some way became one.

My cousin, Donna, passed from cancer. When she found out what type of cancer she had, she thought it may have been genetic. She was insistent that her family all take tests to find out if they may have the cancer markers for what she herself had. If anyone knows Donna, they will know how pushy she could be when she wanted something, so I’m sure her family did take those tests.

Now, onto my dad, Grant. I know more about this story as I was part of pretty much every event leading up to and after his surgery.

A genetic medical condition, aortic stenosis, resulting in my dad’s open-heart surgery was one of the biggest eye-openers for our family and myself especially. I remember my mom & dad telling me about it and my first question was how we did not know this before. Well, as it turns out, Dad did know about it and he had mentioned it to his doctor quite a while ago. As a result, it was monitored if not regularly but enough to know that when my dad started feeling out of sorts, running out of breath on one of his many walks, he decided to check in with his doctor. This resulted in going to see a heart surgeon who concluded that yes, it was time for the surgery Dad was told he would need eventually. I attended appointments with my parents so I could be another set of ears for understanding everything and assist wherever I can.

Here’s where I started asking Dad questions – how did he know he had this heart condition. Because he was overwhelmed with all that was going on, the discussion didn’t last long. So, I started digging into family history. I wasn’t sure how to do this but started where one would think to start, by doing genealogy.

I started with Ancestry.com, and as what usually happens with most who start, became overwhelmed with all the information coming at me from many sources and not really understanding what to do with it.

It took a lot of research, a quick little course or two, joining a local genealogy society and a lot of questions. The outcome, I was pointed in the right direction and found the information I needed.

It turns out, my dad’s father, Stanley Leonard Briggs, had the same heart condition as indicated in his death certificate.

Registration of Death 1 Stanley Leonard Briggs – ca 1962 2

My grandfather, Stanley, had surgery to replace the aortic valve, however, four days later, he had a heart attack and passed. He was very young, and it was devastating as it was thought the surgery would have helped with the issue of aortic stenosis by replacing the aortic stem valve.

Stanley’s father, Thomas Albert Briggs, did have a heart condition and high blood pressure as shown on the Registration of Death.

Thomas Albert Briggs, ca 1945 3 Registration of Death 4

Thomas’ father, Thomas Lasher Briggs, passed away at 81 years of age. At this time, it is unknown how he passed or of what. Some would naturally assume that it was of a heart attack, especially given his age. I do not have a copy of the death certificate – one item on my list to obtain.

Thomas Lasher Briggs 5

As a result of finding out what Dad had was a genetic condition, my two sons and I were tested, and yes, we all have the same condition. So, we need to get checked periodically so when the time comes, we will need the same surgery my dad and grandfather had.

I’ve also found out that some other family members on my dad’s side have the same condition. They knew about it before I did my research. Since having spoken with my uncle, he was the one that passed on this information. To think we could have known before if only we had thought to speak about it!

An historic event for me is going through a major event in life that causes one to take precautions for what may happen in the future. My sons and I are trying to take better care of ourselves, getting exercise and eating better. We know this will not stop the condition from developing, but it will make us more aware if we are having any effects wherein it would cause the surgery to be needed.

Let’s just say I was very pleased with myself for being able to find out this information. If I hadn’t gotten the genealogy research bug, it may have never been known that it was a genetic issue that our family needed to be made aware of.

Oh, and I love doing this type of research – it is immensely rewarding finding out things about your family’s ancestors that brings light to who we are today.

I’d say that’s an historic event – how about you?

  1. BC Museum Archives, Registration #1969-09-007215, Vital Stat Image 004479284_02037.jpg ↩︎
  2. Personal photo ↩︎
  3. Personal photo ↩︎
  4. BC Museum Archives, Registration # 1949-09-002395, Vital Stat Image 004438070_00408.jpg ↩︎
  5. New Westminster Archives, Item IFP0036, ID 31098, ca 1910 – 1919 ↩︎

Family Time: Celebrating 85 Years

This past week was full of surprises – the first being, I need to remind myself to slow down and not rush through the courses. Aced all the assignments, rushed to get the exam completed and did not do as well as I thought I would – surprise!! Don’t rush and take your time to absorb the information. Time to move on and do better with the rest of the courses.

The best surprise of all was seeing my dad, Grant Briggs, for his 85th birthday. He was so happy to see his grandsons (my two boys) and it proved to be the perfect time to take some family photos as my mom had been asking for some updated ones.

I’m proud of my sons for taking the time to travel and see their grandfather for his birthday – they made him very happy (and their grandma, too!!).

Plans for another visit coming soon but, in the meantime, happy 85th birthday to my Dad, and many more – we already have plans to be there for the next one!